The bill on equal parental leave was rejected due to lack of financial coverage following a report by the State Accounting Office. The proposal, presented by the opposition, equalized parental leave between father and mother, bringing paternal leave to 5 months, compared to the shameful 10 days currently foreseen.

So apparently it’s just a financial issue. However, this is not the only cause of the rejection: the opposition was not given time to correct the text, due to a delay in sending the technical report by the Government. If, however, the report had been delivered within the due time, it would have been possible to intervene on the issue of coverage. However, the majority states that they are interested in discussing the topic, which is considered important because, in the words of Minister Calderone, it allows us to bring more and more women into work.

And the men?

The difference in treatment affects both sexes

As we know, the disproportion in leave is a consequence of a different vision of motherhood and fatherhood, due to the belief that the newborn child needs above all the mother, while the father, an accessory figure, must play the role of guarantor of economic security. This disproportion produces two negative effects simultaneously, mirroring each other: the mother finds herself alone after a few days to manage a complex situation from both an emotional and practical point of view, risking serious consequences on well-being and mental health; the father is deprived of the opportunity to enjoy his son and establish a bond with him in the first months of life.

Furthermore, the habit for women of giving up their career, and partly also their personal life, is strengthened, maintaining inequalities also on the work level: the woman gives up her career, while the man does not, therefore pregnancy is seen as a handicap for the woman. It is therefore a proposal that can be widely shared, both by those who are oriented to the left, who therefore want to break down stereotypes, and by those who are on the right, who particularly care about the family and also the paternal role.

The role of the father always remains subordinate

The latter, however, is constantly ignored in political and media communication. Equal leave is always presented as a female achievement, a tool through which to achieve emancipation; that is, equality is seen as something that helps women to have the same opportunities as men. But equality, involving two poles, should go parallel in two directions. And one of these, chained to the other, is the father’s right to be present in his son’s life, not to be considered inferior. Why not put it in these terms too?

It seems that we cannot talk about equality except in relation to women. Yet, this type of communication also harms the women themselves, given that it continues to confirm that, in any case, the father matters less. And if the father matters less, the woman continues to be associated primarily with parenthood: it is the woman who takes care of the children, the man does not know how to do it – as is very often said – and must do it more to help the woman than because he is a parent as much as she is.

Is it useful to present the picture in this way?

From a communication point of view, it would therefore be much more effective to highlight the equal rights and duties of both parents, without highlighting the benefit that one of the two would gain from it. Also because cultural work should be done in parallel with the law, to progressively eradicate this vision of parenting, which is still strongly present; Even though there are more and more fathers who want and expect to be central in their children’s lives from the first months of life, the widespread tendency to clearly separate the male and female roles remains. It is therefore time to start presenting this battle in a different way, also reaching a much higher number of citizens.