In these hours the whole of Italy is shaken by the triple murder of Paderno Dugnano (Milan). Many are wondering how a boy, apparently without any kind of problem, can decide to exterminate the entire family. To try to give an answer to this complex question, we must start from the words young:

“There is no real reason why I killed them. I felt like a foreign body in my family. Oppressed. I thought that by killing them all I would be free from this discomfort. I realized it a minute later: I understood that it was not by killing them that I would be freed.” And again: “I really don’t know how to explain it. I feel alone even among others. (…) I had no real dialogue with anyone. It was as if no one understood me.”

There is always a motive

As in the murder of Sharon Verzeni, also in this case the same confusion about the motive recurs. But let’s reiterate: the motive is always there, and in this case it is identified by the executioner himself in an unspecified “sense of oppression”, which in turn seems to be strictly linked to a lack of emotional recognition and a consequent perception of loneliness.

But to say that the motive can be traced back exclusively to adolescent loneliness would be reductive. Behind this type of crime, in fact, we can see all the sick selfishness of our adult society. A selfishness that leads us to destroy the lives of others in a desperate attempt to improve our own, only to then realize that this game of massacre does nothing but lead us all into the abyss.

It’s not a teenage issue

So no, this is not just an “adolescent” issue, as many are claiming these days. Adolescence is certainly an extremely delicate phase of life, especially from the point of view of managing emotions, yet the psychological dynamics behind the Paderno massacre seem to dramatically recall a type of crime that can be committed at any age. Let’s think, for example, of those men who exterminate their family in order to have a relationship, without a hitch, with their lover. Or those mothers who, before committing suicide, kill their children to take them with them and take them away from their father.

Selfishness above all else

All these massacres have one motive in common: selfishness. “My” well-being is more important than that of everyone else; “I” suffer more than everyone else; “my” suffering justifies me, always and in any case. A dangerous narcissistic drift, which breaks every balance, every meaning, and pushes one to madness.

So let’s not fill our mouths with empty words, like “We must educate young people”, because the problem is not only related to youth. If this is how we think, we risk always falling into the same stereotypical dynamic. So if it is a black person who commits a crime, the problem is ethnicity (and immigration), if it is a man then it is gender (and patriarchy), if it is a young person then the problem is age (and school or family). All too banal. Let’s broaden our gaze and not stop at appearances, or we will never solve anything.